The Power of Acknowledgment in the Healing Process: How to Take the First Step

Healing is a journey—one that requires courage, patience, and self-compassion.

As someone who has walked the path of healing from childhood trauma and complex experiences, I can tell you that the first step to reclaiming your life is acknowledgment. This is the raw, honest truth of your story.

Why We Can’t Ignore the Pain

I’ll be honest with you: for years, I tried to sweep it all under the rug. I thought that if I just kept busy, smiled enough and avoided looking too closely at my wounds, I’d be okay. I even thought leaving the people who hurt me would be enough to start a new. But it wasn’t.

The hurt didn’t just magically go away because I pretended it wasn’t there. It lived inside me, shaping how I saw myself and how I moved through the world. Ignoring the pain didn’t heal it—it buried it deeper. And buried pain has a way of showing up in unexpected and destructive ways.

You see, unacknowledged trauma has a way of weaving itself into every part of our lives. Spiritually, it disconnects us from our true selves, leaving us feeling lost, fragmented, and unfulfilled. This inner disconnection can manifest as self-destructive behaviours that seem unexplainable until you trace them back to the wounds you’ve been carrying.

My true healing began the day I stopped running. It started when I faced the truth, even though it was scary, uncomfortable and I had to face some very hard realisations that would be painful to accept.

What Needs to Be Acknowledged

💔 What Happened

Acknowledging the events and experiences that shaped your pain is hard, but it’s also necessary for healing. For me, this meant confronting the physical and emotional abuse I endured as a child—the constant fear, the criticism, and the unpredictable physical outbursts that made me feel unsafe in my own home and riddled me with anxiety. It also meant facing the neglect and abandonment that left me feeling unseen and unworthy of love. That's not just from my mother’s instability but my father’s withdrawal of his love and protection too.

💔 What You Lost

Trauma doesn’t just leave scars—it steals parts of you, parts you don’t realise are gone until you try to live without them. Maybe you lost your sense of safety, your ability to trust others, or the belief that you’re enough just as you are. For me, I lost pieces of myself every time I had to hide my feelings to survive. I became an expert at suppressing my needs and emotions, believing that showing vulnerability would only lead to more pain.

I also lost the hope that things would ever change. A part of me kept waiting for my father to come to my rescue, to finally see the pain I was in and make things right—but that hope faded, leaving behind a deep sense of betrayal. I lost the connection to my siblings when I had to leave them behind.

Perhaps the most profound loss for me was the chance to experience a happy, carefree childhood. I didn’t get to grow up with a foundation of safety or joy. I didn’t get to feel what it’s like to be nurtured, protected, or unconditionally loved by my mother. I had lost my relationship I thought i'd once had with my father and my trust in him. I feel like those things were stolen from me, leaving behind wounds that took years to even begin to address.these realisations—that I never got to feel what it’s like to truly be loved by my mother—was devastating.

💔 What You Didn’t Receive

Many of us didn’t get the love, care, or emotional validation we so desperately needed as children. I had to face the reality that my parents would never be able to love and look after me the way I needed. I didn’t receive the consistent reassurance that I was valued, the protection that would have made me feel safe, or the nurturing guidance to help me navigate life’s challenges.

I also didn’t receive the emotional acknowledgment that every child deserves for my painful experiences or so much as a simple 'sorry'.

It made me question my worth for so long, wondering what was so wrong with me that I wasn’t deserving of that love. But as I’ve healed, I’ve come to understand that her inability to give love wasn’t my fault. Still, the absence of it shaped how I viewed myself and the world for years to come.

💔 What You Feel

For years, I tried not to feel anything at all, thinking that if I could just numb the pain, it would eventually go away. But emotions don’t disappear just because we ignore them—they accumulate and show up in other ways, whether it’s through anxiety, depression, physical illness, financial crisis, attracting toxic relationships or even causing problems in our relationships.

Acknowledging my anger, grief, and sadness was one of the hardest parts of my journey, but also one of the most freeing. I had to give myself permission to feel angry at the people who hurt me, to grieve the childhood I didn’t get to have, and to sit with the deep sadness that came from realising how much I’d lost.

What I’ve come to realise is that everything I feel is valid. My anger doesn’t make me a bad person, my grief doesn’t make me weak, and my sadness doesn’t mean I’ll be stuck forever. These emotions are part of the healing process—they’re a sign that I’m finally allowing myself to honour my experiences and move forward. Feeling is hard, but it’s also the doorway to freedom and transformation.

The Power of Acknowledgment

When you finally acknowledge your pain, you take the first step toward freeing yourself from it. Pretending the past didn’t happen or that it doesn’t hurt only keeps you stuck. But when you face it head-on, you begin to release its hold on you.

Once I acknowledged and grieved for what i needed to, I began to unravel how my childhood wounds were still affecting my life. From there, I could then start to look at how I could address and change these issues such as self destructing behaviours, habits that were holding me back, the childhood programming that was keeping me stuck in my old patterns and emotions. Once I understood all of these things, I could start to break free from those patterns, little by little.

How to Begin Acknowledging

How to Begin Acknowledging Your Trauma

Acknowledging your trauma is an essential step toward healing, but it can feel overwhelming. These are some different methods that helped me connect with my emotions and begin processing my experiences. Each approach offers a unique way to take that first step, so choose what feels most comfortable for you.

📝 Write It Out

Journaling became my safe space to pour out everything I’d kept bottled up inside. Start by writing about what happened, how you felt, and what you lost. Don’t censor yourself—this is your space to be completely honest.

You might also try guided prompts to help you dig deeper:

• "What would I say to my younger self who went through that?"

• "What emotions come up when I think about this experience?"

• "What do I need to let go of to move forward?"

  
  

Seeing your thoughts and feelings on paper can provide clarity and help you process them in a way that’s less overwhelming than keeping them in your head. Over time, your journal can become a tool for tracking your progress and uncovering patterns in your emotions and behaviours.

💭 Reflect on Memories

Take time to gently revisit the key moments in your life that shaped who you are today. Start with the memories that surface most often—these are likely tied to unresolved feelings. Reflect on questions like:

• "What did this moment teach me about myself?"

• "What belief did I form about life, love, or safety because of this experience?"

• "How does this memory still affect me today?"

This process isn’t about reliving your pain—it’s about understanding it. For example, maybe a moment of rejection taught you to believe you weren’t good enough, or an instance of neglect made you think you had to handle everything on your own. By identifying these beliefs, you can begin challenging them and replacing them with healthier, more empowering ones.

🎨 Express Creatively

Not every emotion can be put into words, and that’s okay. Creative expression offers a way to release what you’re feeling without having to explain it. I turned to art—scribbling, painting, and creating—as a way to process emotions I didn’t fully understand.

You don’t need to be an artist for this to work. Try:

• Doodling your emotions (e.g., what does sadness or anger look like to you?)

• Painting with colours that represent how you feel.

• Creating a collage using images or words that resonate with your journey.

Art helps bypass the logical mind and allows your subconscious to communicate. It can also bring a sense of relief and calm after releasing pent-up emotions.

🗣️ Speak It

Speaking your truth out loud can be one of the most validating and empowering steps in acknowledging your trauma. For me, mirror work was a game-changer. Standing in front of the mirror, I spoke to myself—not just about the pain, but about what I needed to hear. At first, it felt awkward, but over time, it became a powerful way to connect with myself.

Other ways to speak your truth include:

• Talking to a therapist or counsellor who can hold space for you without judgment.

• Sharing your story with a trusted friend or support group.

• Recording yourself on video or audio, even if no one else will hear it.

Hearing your own voice speak your experiences can be incredibly healing. It validates your pain and helps you reclaim your story. Speaking out doesn’t have to happen all at once—start with small, safe steps, and let your voice grow stronger with time.

Acknowledging your trauma is a deeply personal process, and there’s no “right” way to do it. What matters is that you start. Healing begins the moment you give yourself permission to face your pain and explore the parts of you that need care and compassion.

Tips for This Step

💡 Go Slow

Acknowledging your truth can feel overwhelming. Take it one step at a time, and don’t feel like you have to face everything all at once.

💡 Be Gentle with Yourself

Healing is messy, and that’s okay. Show yourself the same kindness you would offer a close friend.

💡 Create a Safe Space

Whether it’s through therapy, journaling, or leaning on a supportive community, find a place where you feel safe to explore your feelings.

Final Thoughts

Acknowledgment is the foundation of healing. It’s not about staying stuck in the pain—it’s about freeing yourself from it. When you face your truth, you take back the power that trauma tried to steal from you.

You can’t change the past, but you can reclaim your future. And it all begins with this brave, beautiful step.

✨ Start today. You are worth it. Your healing journey is waiting. 💖

You can find my journalling prompts recourse to download for free here to help get you started.